It finally happened. I got called for a Marist poll. When Biden’s approval rates come out this week, I will be part of them. The questions were ripped from the headlines just like any good episode of Law & Order. I was asked if I considered internet capabilities, care for the elderly, and fixing of water pipes to be infrastructure (presumably to see if Republicans’ talking point about the plan being massive overreach were working). And then the pollster turned her attention to the plethora of state laws about trans kids. I was asked if I supported efforts to prevent them from participating in sports at each level of school and how I felt about laws that would ban gender affirming treatment. (I called such laws cruel which was apparently not one of the options.) Interestingly, the phone call happened on the day that Arkansas Governor Asa Hutchinson had vetoed the draconian bill on which that last part of the question was based, and I was feeling slightly hopeful that the worst parts of the GOP’s newest cultural wedge issue—vilifying trans kids and the parents willing to support them—would fade. Hutchinson isn’t a hero; he was fine with banning trans kids from sports, but he called this bill government overreach which seemed so obvious to me. The party of small government and parental consent is once again contorting itself to argue that the government clearly belongs between kids, their parents, and their doctors. (It has been similarly contorting itself for years to suggest a government that, to paraphrase Josh Lyman, is just small enough to fit our uteruses.) In fact, Arkansas passed a law this legislative session re-emphasizing that parents have a right to see everything their kids might learn about LGBTQ issues weeks before it’s presented in the classroom because, you know, parental rights are so important. Unless, of course, that parent is supportive of their trans child. The Arkansas legislature overrode Hutchinson’s veto the next day proving that both their hypocrisy and their cruelty are alive and well. The ACLU is working on lawsuits that will hopefully mean this law is never actually implemented (which Hutchinson pointed out would have an especially devastating impact on kids in his state who are already on gender affirming therapies).
“Mask Up to Keep it Up:” New Study Suggests Covid-19 Increase Risk of Erectile Dysfunction
A new article, published in the March issue of Andrology, shows a preliminary correlation between Covid-19 infection and subsequent erectile dysfunction (ED). My very first thought when I read of the study was that this might finally be what convinces the hyper-masculine men who have decided Covid-19 protocols are for sissies to put on their masks and roll up their sleeves for the vaccine. Apparently, this is a thought that doesn’t get lost in translation. The authors—a team of Italian researchers—titled their article “Mask Up to Keep it Up.”
The researchers analyzed data from an online survey about sex and Covid which was conducted in Italy in April and May of last year. They matched responses from sexually active men who had had Covid with those of similar men who had not. Their analysis found the prevalence of ED was significantly higher among men who self-reported a history of Covid-19 (28%) compared with those who did not (9.33%). After adjusting for other factors that could impact ED risk, such as psychosocial status, age, and BMI, they determined that men who have had Covid-19 infection are 5.66 times more likely to suffer from ED than their peers who have not.
At this point, the relationship between Covid-19 and ED is merely a correlation. And, we know that the same health issues that increase men’s risk of getting a more serious case of Covid, such as diabetes, heart disease, or obesity, also increase their risk of having ED in the first place. Still, the connection could help us better understand both Covid and ED. The researchers suggest that people who experience sudden onset of ED might want to get tested for Covid and that physicians could use ED after Covid as a measure of overall health and recovery.
More research has to be done but, in the meantime, we have our newest public health slogan— “mask up to keep it up.” Apparently, it’s better in English because there’s no direct translation for mask up in Italian. According to an Italian-speaking friend, at home the researchers would have to say “tenete la mascherina su per tenere il cazzo su” which is more like keep your mask up to keep your dick up. Not bad, but not quite as catchy.
Baby Born with Three Penises; First Documented Case
A baby treated by doctors in Iraq has become the first documented case of triphallia; he was born with three penises.
Supernumerary penises are a very rare congenital condition which is estimated to occur in just one out of every five or six million live births. There are about 100 documented cases of babies born with two penises, but this is the first case of three.
The baby was first seen by doctors when he was three months old because his parents were concerned about scrotal swelling. He had a functioning penis, which included a urethra (the tube that carries urine and semen out of the body) and a scrotum in the usual place. He also had two smaller penises that came out from the perineum. These penises had both corpus cavernosum and corpus spongiosum—columns of tissue that support the urethra and can become erect when blood rushes to them during sexual excitement. Neither of the extra penises had a urethra, however, which made the surgery to remove them easier.
While extra penises might sound like fun, it’s incredibly rare that someone is born with two penises that function fully. Some of the extra penises that have been studied have both corpus cavernosum and corpus spongiosum, but some only have one of these structures and others are just the head of the penis. In many cases, supernumerary penises present with other developmental complications, including anomalies of the scrotum, testes, bladder, lower GI tract, or even the heart. The doctors who wrote up this new case for The International Journal of Surgery Case Reports explain: “Treatment is difficult because it poses medical, ethical, and cosmetic aspects. A combined multidisciplinary team is required for the management and long term follow up is required.”
That said, there may be people who have lived happily with their two penises and never presented to doctors for treatment. An anatomy professor told Live Sciences that he once received a cadaver with two fully formed, full-sized penises with a urethral opening between them at the base. The 80-year-old man who had donated his body to science hadn’t even noted this anomaly in his paperwork. Unfortunately, since they didn’t learn about this case until after he died, they were unable to ask him any of the multitude of questions we would all have for a man who lived a long life with two schwanzstuckers.
As for the baby, he was treated over a year ago and is said to be doing well.