Pinky Period Gloves Get Rightly Ridiculed

Three German men solve non-existent menstruation problem with giant glove.

It’s not as fun as Ahh Balls, but I guess this could be considered “the Period Edition.” It’s a little bit of a stretch to say that the story about Arizona’s attempt at a super-restrictive sex education law was about periods except that if the law had gone into effect many students in that state would have started menstruating before they ever heard the word in school. But the first and last story show just how much we still don’t know about periods and why it’s probably a mistake to put men in charge of, well, anything related to menstruation (apologies for the generalization, but when you read about the gloves, you’ll understand). I suppose it’s not surprising that period symptoms aren’t tracked in most clinical drug trials or that women have historically been excluded from much of medical research out of fears that hormones, periods, pregnancy would complicate the data. But not collecting the data doesn’t mean the complications don’t exist, it just means we will never get closer to understanding them.

Are Covid Vaccines Causing Wonky Periods?

In addition to the fever, chills, and headaches that we’ve all been told could be a normal reaction to any of the three Covid-19 vaccines currently available here, menstruators across the country are reporting changes to their periods. Some say they have had heavier periods while others note shifts in timing. One friend of mine told me she got her period the day after her shot which was a full two weeks earlier than expected, while another, who had been hoping she was in menopause, got her first period in six months post-vaccination.

Not surprisingly, there have yet to be any studies on this topic (we’re still in early stages of this vaccination campaign) and, without that, experts disagree about whether this could really be a symptom and the biological mechanism that could be behind it. 

One doctor who spoke with Science Times said she did not think that changes in periods were really a symptom of vaccination (she couldn’t see a scientific reason this would happen). Instead, she suggested women who were having period pain alongside the aches and pains caused by the vaccines may be in more discomfort than usual and see (or feel) a connection between the two sets of symptoms.

Others, however, looked to the granddames of periods:  hormones. The whole process of menstruation—from ovulation to preparing the uterus for a pregnancy to shedding the lining when there is no fertilized egg—is governed by hormones, including estrogen and progesterone, that spike and drop and level out.  So, one theory is that the vaccine causes a hormonal spike which is inevitably followed by a hormonal drop which can in turn trigger bleeding. Dr. Julie Levitt, an OB-GYN at Northwestern Medicine who saw a couple of patients complaining of strange periods post-vaccine, posited this idea in Science Time. She said, however, that this would be considered normal bleeding and shouldn’t be cause for concern.

Another theory involves the immune system and inflammation. In an op-ed for the New York Times, Alice Lu-Culligan, an MD and PhD student at Yale Medical School, and Dr. Randi Hutter Epstein, the writer-in-residence at the school, explained that thickening of the lining of the uterus and the subsequent sloughing off (such a lovely phrase) involve different immune cells and that menstruation itself causes a lot of inflammation (hence menstrual cramps). They write: “Since the cycle is supported by the immune system at every turn, it is possible that the vaccines, which are designed to ignite an immune response, temporarily change the normal course of events.” 

The main point of their article, however, is that we don’t know because there have been so few studies done on periods. Clinical trials—like the ones done to study the safety and efficacy of these new vaccines—rarely collect data on menstrual cycles or period symptoms. In fact, the authors tell us, for much of modern medical history women weren’t included in clinical trials at all because of fears that hormones, menstruation, and pregnancy would skew results. The authors would like this to change:

Rather than treat menstrual cycles as unimportant or too complicated, researchers should view tracking periods in future studies as a potential opportunity. Such work could help us to better understand the ways in which women respond differently to many diseases, treatments and interventions, not just the ones surrounding Covid-19. It could also inform our approach to the management of long-overlooked conditions known to be affected by the menstrual cycle, such as endometriosis.

In the meantime, there are some efforts underway to track post-vaccination period symptoms. Kathryn Lee and Kate Clancy, researchers from Washington University’s School of Medicine and The University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign respectively, noticed changes in their own menstrual cycles after they got the vaccine and wondered whether other women had similar reactions. They developed a survey that has already been completed by over 30,000 women. The researchers warn, however, that this will only provide us with hints about the association between vaccines and period changes, it won’t be able to prove cause and effect or even determine prevalence; more research will be needed for that.

Even as experts are coming up with differing theories of why and how vaccines might mess with periods, there is widespread agreement that this is not a reason to skip the vaccine. Periods get wonky sometimes and that’s okay. Annoying but okay.

Arizona Governor Vetoes Restrictive Sex Ed Bill

This week we got another surprise veto from a Republican governor. Arizona Governor Doug Ducey vetoed legislation that seemed designed to prevent students in the state from learning anything about sexual orientation or gender identity. Ducey called the legislation too broad and too vague.  

Senate Bill 1456 aimed to change what and when young people learn about sex in Arizona’s public and charter schools. First, it would have banned all sex ed before fifth grade. Most notably, the law said schools could only discuss issues of gender identity, sexual orientation, and HIV/AIDs if parents were notified well in advance and provided permission for this instruction. As we’ve discussed before, this is referred to as an opt-in policy and not only adds administrative headaches for the school, but may prevent young people from participating in class simply because they forgot to bring home a permission slip or their parents didn’t bother to sign it. But this legislation goes even further because, according to its sponsor, the opt-in requirement would have extended beyond sex ed to any class that discusses sexual orientation at all—say a history class on the gay rights movement or a law class about same-sex marriage.

The legislation was supported by conservative groups who said that parents have the right to know what their kids are learning in sex ed. But here’s the thing—Arizona was one of the handful of states that already had an opt-in policy for sex ed. Adding an additional administrative layer that applies specifically to teaching anything about sexual orientation and gender really does make one question lawmakers’ motives. And, including HIV/AIDS in that law puts their biases firmly on display. As Rep. Diego Rodriguez, who voted against the legislation, told the local media, requiring a separate opt-in for discussions about things like sexual orientation is both unnecessary and discriminatory: “It’s clearly meant to highlight that there is something different about gender identity and gender expression. And that difference is something that should be feared.”

Rodriguez called this bill a giant step backwards. Just two years ago, the Arizona legislature finally rewrote the sex ed law to remove a provision that prevented teachers from mentioning homosexuality as a “positive lifestyle” or admitting that there was such a thing as safe homosexual sex. Of course, that vote was taken under duress—Equality Arizona had filed a lawsuit and the attorney general refused to defend the existing provisions.

Other lawmakers pointed out that fifth grade is far too late to start sex education. Rep. Jennifer Jermaine, D-Chandler, said: “It is too late for them to learn good touch/bad touch because they have already been molested, they have already been abused. And, more than likely, it was from somebody within their own household.” And, we should remember that some kids are well into puberty by fifth grade.

Though he vetoed the legislation, Ducey did pull together some of its provisions regarding parents and school boards into an executive order. The order says, among other things, that parents must have access to all materials online or in-person for at least two weeks before the course is set to begin. Okay, fine, I bet I can count on one hand the number of parents who will actually read it.

Pinky Period Gloves Rightly Ridiculed by the Entire Internet

The latest entry in feminine hygiene products we really don’t need comes from three men in Germany who invented the Pinky Gloves. The story of these gloves came to light last week after the company’s Instagram post was translated. Apparently, two of the company’s founders met in the army where they lived with members of the opposite sex for the first time and were shocked to discover there were no good options for disposing of their tampons and pads. They claim to have talked to multiple women who agreed that when they are out and about it’s hard to dispose of period products. I’m not sure who they spoke with, but this is not a problem I’ve ever had in three decades of menstruating.

Anyhow, ten-plus years later, they finally developed the solution...a glove? Oh, and it’s pink. (Get it, pink is a girl color and girls get their periods and pinky is a finger and gloves have fingers. These men are clearly clever beyond words.)

I feel like something was lost in translation because if the problem is nowhere to throw out a tampon, a glove doesn’t really help unless the idea was that you stick the bloody tampon in your purse and carry it around until you get home, which gets a hard “no” from me and anyone else who has ever menstruated.

The most logical explanation of why the solution comes shaped (kind of) like a glove is that it is meant to prevent women from getting blood on their hands when we change our tampons or pads. The internet (all of it really) has, rightly, chewed the inventors out for suggesting that period blood is too gross to touch or we women are too delicate to touch it. With even a moderate menstrual flow, it is unlikely that one inserts and removes a day’s worth of tampons without getting a little bit of blood on their fingers but that’s why there is soap and water. No one needs gloves to touch their own body and suggesting they do only underscores the whole narrative of vaginas being dirty and smelly and gross which we certainly don’t need.

Moreover, in this age of protecting the environment and cutting down on waste that has women turning toward reusable menstrual cups (which definitely involve touching blood), adding another piece of garbage to each tampon change seems even more ridiculous.

And, finally, take a look at the size and shape of this glove—what kind of pink monstrosity is this? (The jokes we came up with in this house about who this was glove was really for veered so inappropriate so fast that I can’t share them here, but let’s just say Mrs. Jolly Green Giant, Ronald McDonald, and the disembodied spokeshand for Hamburger/Tuna Helper all came up.)